Stillbirth.Why did this have to happen.....? - how to cope with stillbirth
Hello everyone, my son Matthew James on January 20, 2009 stillborn. This afternoon I had an appointment with the doctor, the one triggered by a date, but she came to work yesterday and was told to go the appointment and normal. I went to the hospital after the nurse could not see their heart rate after 2 scans and I said there was no heartbeat was dead, and.
I think it's terribly difficult. I miss my baby and feel so bereft of memories when he died in my lap. My body had been through wars and my years he has concentrated on his arrival and now have nothing.
I can not help, it was my fault somehow, but something that I did not do t /, or bad karma, and I am also very difficult not to get angry, jealous, betrayed to others and desperately sad. This pain is so difficult to manage. Now I really feel lost in life and what has always happened in my head and feel guilty when you try to continue their lives without him.
It sounds stupid, but I'm so afraid Forgetttion about my beautiful child.
I absolutely want a reason for this tragic turn of events came to me and my dear friend and I absolutely want a baby, but now I am scared happening again. I was so nervous in my first pregnancy, but I told myself to relax and not worry about it, and succeeded in gradually. They told me I had the right of all and in the prenatal record just a week before his heart was strong and determined and willing to a mother who is also very difficult to treat. Now I'm worried that the next time I will not sleep during the entire 9 months, who has ever been there? As you learn to control this fear and the horrible feeling I have.
Where can I find the strength to go through this again?
Has anyone seen come and smile the other side?
How To Cope With Stillbirth Stillbirth.Why Did This Have To Happen.....?
19 comments:
I've never been through such persons. There were a couple in my church, but 4 miscarriages and stillbirths was increased before finally in a position to have a child. I think you need advice, I can only imagine what happens.
I pray for you.
What you describe, except that she went into labor, that is exactly what happened. First, you cry, and you have to leave to grieve. The loss of a child is so difficult to overcome, and we need to cry, but we should try very hard not to feel too so long guilty.I, but only make it more difficult. For everything that has his reasons, God called her baby. IDon't know that their beliefs, but I have a little strength from my faith, first, where they are now, without success. One thing I wanted was someone who was there and have a conversation. If this is allowed or not ... I am more than happy to shoulder, you support them. My email is Mar8loc@aol.com
I have my Patrick March 11, 1994. There were 14 in the next month, and sometimes even sadness, I do not think forget. One thing that is difficult is that he buried 500 miles away, so just go to her grave once a year. When we lived there, I sat down and "talk" with him, and oddly enough, helped.
No need to be afraid of it happening again. I have 8 beautiful children (2 steps were taken) and then I lost my Patrick, I had a handsome son 4 years later.
There are really no answers, just something that happens and that God alone has the answer why. It is time until the pain subsides enough, is to function normally, but it is a bit less to be hurt. Your child will forever live in his heart. Children, no matter how much you have a future, there shall be in spirit. Think of my Patrick day of each and every one, and since then it has been entered into my heart meaningless. I am afraid that after a time when we were still a child and I decided it was very worth trying again, and I asked my heart and I had my son in 1998.
Give a little time, but not afraid to try again. The odds are with you and believe only. Your child will be in your heart forever, but we can not deny the joy in the celebration of a beautiful angel in my arms. FaithFree e-mail at any time and in my prayers.
Sorry for your loss. My dear friend had a young son died of his term of 1 years 4 months. It is not yet fully recovered. The good news is that there is a healthy baby 3 months ago.
No words can heal the pain, I know. You are in my prayers. Remember to say anything! No tears or emotion. You need it.
I'm sorry for your loss. Take some time to heal and to grieve for this child. Put no pressure on you to have another child right now. Mourning and let it out. Okay. Find someone to talk to about someone who can really hear. You will find your smile, in time, but for now, let the emotions that arise, must go. What do you do, however, remain to help, and others. Not fall into a trap of depression ... to live a lot, and there are better days.
My heart breaks for you. I had broken my heart when I 22 weeks pregnant. My baby had a lethal anomaly, and there was nothing to do. She described how I felt. It was the hardest thing I've been through, and I've never felt this kind of loss or pain before.
Sorry for your loss.
get by even though it is now very difficult to see about themselves or the moving image.
warehouse and feed friends, family, what they are there.
Do not place unrealistic expectations on themselves.
I understand that you will weep as you grieve.
never forget your precious son, and the pain never goes away completely.
You can not understand why it happened.
to overcome.
I try to look into the future and eventually will do the same.
What you describe, except that she went into labor, that is exactly what happened. First, you cry, and you have to leave to grieve. The loss of a child is so difficult to overcome, and we need to cry, but we should try very hard not to feel too so long guilty.I, but only make it more difficult. For everything that has his reasons, God called her baby. IDon't know that their beliefs, but I have a little strength from my faith, first, where they are now, without success. One thing I wanted was someone who was there and have a conversation. If this is allowed or not ... I am more than happy to shoulder, you support them. My email is Mar8loc@aol.com
I have my Patrick March 11, 1994. There were 14 in the next month, and sometimes even sadness, I do not think forget. One thing that is difficult is that he buried 500 miles away, so just go to her grave once a year. When we lived there, I sat down and "talk" with him, and oddly enough, helped.
No need to be afraid of it happening again. I have 8 beautiful children (2 steps were taken) and then I lost my Patrick, I had a handsome son 4 years later.
There are really no answers, just something that happens and that God alone has the answer why. It is time until the pain subsides enough, is to function normally, but it is a bit less to be hurt. Your child will forever live in his heart. Children, no matter how much you have a future, there shall be in spirit. Think of my Patrick day of each and every one, and since then it has been entered into my heart meaningless. I am afraid that after a time when we were still a child and I decided it was very worth trying again, and I asked my heart and I had my son in 1998.
Give a little time, but not afraid to try again. The odds are with you and believe only. Your child will be in your heart forever, but we can not deny the joy in the celebration of a beautiful angel in my arms. FaithFree e-mail at any time and in my prayers.
What you describe, except that she went into labor, that is exactly what happened. First, you cry, and you have to leave to grieve. The loss of a child is so difficult to overcome, and we need to cry, but we should try very hard not to feel too so long guilty.I, but only make it more difficult. For everything that has his reasons, God called her baby. IDon't know that their beliefs, but I have a little strength from my faith, first, where they are now, without success. One thing I wanted was someone who was there and have a conversation. If this is allowed or not ... I am more than happy to shoulder, you support them. My email is Mar8loc@aol.com
I have my Patrick March 11, 1994. There were 14 in the next month, and sometimes even sadness, I do not think forget. One thing that is difficult is that he buried 500 miles away, so just go to her grave once a year. When we lived there, I sat down and "talk" with him, and oddly enough, helped.
No need to be afraid of it happening again. I have 8 beautiful children (2 steps were taken) and then I lost my Patrick, I had a handsome son 4 years later.
There are really no answers, just something that happens and that God alone has the answer why. It is time until the pain subsides enough, is to function normally, but it is a bit less to be hurt. Your child will forever live in his heart. Children, no matter how much you have a future, there shall be in spirit. Think of my Patrick day of each and every one, and since then it has been entered into my heart meaningless. I am afraid that after a time when we were still a child and I decided it was very worth trying again, and I asked my heart and I had my son in 1998.
Give a little time, but not afraid to try again. The odds are with you and believe only. Your child will be in your heart forever, but we can not deny the joy in the celebration of a beautiful angel in my arms. FaithFree e-mail at any time and in my prayers.
Hello,
The sorry to hear about your loss,
My baby died in my stomach, I have in my analysis, as seen when she told me, is dead, I felt my heart was torn down. I argued and screamed her sister told her that I knew he was not dead because I saw the accused of lying to be honest I do not remember, I remember to leave room or something of the disorder in the Lost Boy, and was pregnant again 4 months later mygorgeous son is now 5, told me that I am not the hospital girl after my son, I s I never had an explanation why, but there is still much to my surprise, 3 years of a beautiful little girl. I always thought that after the model was obviously wrong and that it does not improve life for him, I know it's hard, but that's what I think, because I do what you're doing 'm sure I made the right choice . When I was pregnant with my son, I was during the first 2 or 3 months and found that I am relaxed because I was stress and unease about the more I became aware, concerned that I was causing stress in my little baby develops. Time is a great healer, and because each of theay to spend my off the excitement. Everyone is different and we all have our own strengths and weaknesses of each of us in the eye path. One thing I have noticed that haunts me a little, and pregnant with my son, I had dreams of something terrible happening to him and also someone who took the time to complete than I, "I had my daughter that I very badly Even now 3rd I woke up repeatedly called his name. Im not sure if this is something to do with the loss of my first son, but he explains. Once I saw the half and told me that a child was watching over me and I like to think that makes me feel good. I can assure you, you get over the loss of his son and the memories are still there, but you know even the memories fade, but sometimes for the better. I promise to return to smile.
Much Love
I just want to say I'm angry and feel the pain. Although not yet a dead baby ... Last year I lost my son and daughter 6YR of 2 years in a house fire. It is the most horrible thing is in life that occur when a child is lost. You never forget your son ... like a mother who unexpectedly lost 2 children ... Deff I have surrounded by family and friends and sat down in a support group for mothers who lost a child, witch really helped me a lot. None of the women will never heal your broken heart, but every day she'll breathe a little easier to ... that is the best thing I can say. They always have a special place in your heart for your child, no one can fill ... or even another child. Things happen in life that no one can explain, and they do not understand, until one day we get there. Take each day one at a time and now is a duel witches do. If you are crying too ... , Cry, if your anger ... go ... have this right and makes you feel better. And if your list, you can still a child. I know whatsay, if you do not want to continue life and simply be happy ... But as his son looks to you ... You do not want you to live a miserable life. It is ok to smile. Hold your head high and be strong and I promise you that come every day a little easier. God bless you and your family! (hugs)
I'm sorry for your loss.
I can not imagine what happens. First son of my aunt, Ted, was killed at 38 weeks. It was like everybody was devastated for him on the ground. It took some time to feel again as a man. Never forget the little boy. I am sure that Matthew is looking over you and keep you, as Ted was with my aunt.
My aunt came to two children who have received now 5 and 3. She was very worried when she got pregnant again, but I felt I wanted a child because of what happened is, but also because they really wanted a mummy. He felt frustrated because I knew Ted would have a great life. But time heals. She says she never forgets. In his other children to talk about his brother, who is in heaven and visit his grave and bring flowers and knows her mother loved her very much. Not so morbid, just a way, the departure from her life.
From a medical perspective, why this happens is unknown. Nothing, I was wrong.I know that my aunt with her doctor when she was pregnant, said a second time, and I explained what happened so far received more specialized care. This greater involvement of scans and hospital appointments and was finally able to call the hospital to be withdrawn at any time. I think it helped contribute some of their concerns.
Sorry again for your loss. Take time to heal and surround yourself with people like you and let them take care of you.
I have not lost a child before birth, but I have lost a child several years ago. Everyone is correct, I would like to add something.
When my son, he was eleven years old. It was my second son, and had an older sister and younger brother. I was happy then and still today, the children have always been my love, when her mother spilled was gone.
If you and your boyfriend) (well, I personally recommend the first man, but it really does not matter really try for another baby immediately, there is nothing ill try again. Yes, you are scared and worried that what went wrong the first time it is going wrong again. But do not listen to live and love and having children.
Moreover, the idea was that you can be your mind, or that other people might think you are "substitute" for the prodigal son. But after a couple of kids, you realize that even possible, even if the thought came to mind. They loveKey to energy, what wisdom and knowledge to learn patience and to give. Do not let this terrible situation and sad experiences in his own way.
If you have one, you become a parent to another. They have a deep understanding of how much their children are tragically not really theirs. Most of the "taken" to die. Even if they survive to birth, infancy, childhood, youth and parents to grow (lol), and still do things against the approval and bear the consequences grow, and beyond. I go and go. It will not make that easier to let go, but the parents in this respect offers a much better result than trying to keep her mother in a box.
You will lose a lot of memories of your baby - sorry to say but true. This is partly because there is little time together to make memories - the pain is terrible in all memories not in a position to do together. You do not need to "forget" him - every year9, ll remember your birthday in your heart. Following the submission of their high school anonymously and dream of the man who might have been. You see a beautiful girl of her age and I wonder whether I could be his girlfriend or wife. Go to sporting events with their other children to come and I wonder what could be the sport and if there is something good in them. Should I climb the trees or have broken a dog, arm or a leg? Would it have been a bookworm or quit? Would it have been wise, or that its strength lies in the muscles? Would it be hard or soft?
The pain does not disappear, but is a little easier. Anniversaries are hard, and even if you do not agree on the surface of your mind, remember, your body. I have a terrible August of each year, because my son was killed, the 10th August. Last year was the first year, I do not remember - but I slept a lot and I feel terrible if I remember the day. But there is joy in the middle, life flowsforward.
I will pay no pressure, but I tell you, a cup of maternal love, and will not hurt, or someone, anyone.
Sorry for your loss. My dear friend had a young son died of his term of 1 years 4 months. It is not yet fully recovered. The good news is that there is a healthy baby 3 months ago.
No words can heal the pain, I know. You are in my prayers. Remember to say anything! No tears or emotion. You need it.
Hey Hunny. First, I am SOOO SORRY for your loss. I really am. I wish I could hug you! I can not even imagine how it feels. I walked by himself, but my cousin. It is very tragic. She did not think I have 2 other children are very healthy. I really do not know what I say, I feel sooo bad. It is a terrible thing that needs to go. I simply mean that you're a strong woman and I know that I suffer so badly, but you go. It will take some time. My thoughts and prayers are with you. And God bless and be with you now \\ \\ \\ \\ \\ \\ \\ \\ u0026lt 3
hun it is a failure is not good when this hapens Horrable but if you want to try for children no misforutune terrable this should not stop it, btw Matthew James rest in peace
My heart breaks for you. I had broken my heart when I 22 weeks pregnant. My baby had a lethal anomaly, and there was nothing to do. She described how I felt. It was the hardest thing I've been through, and I've never felt this kind of loss or pain before.
Sorry for your loss.
get by even though it is now very difficult to see about themselves or the moving image.
warehouse and feed friends, family, what they are there.
Do not place unrealistic expectations on themselves.
I understand that you will weep as you grieve.
never forget your precious son, and the pain never goes away completely.
You can not understand why it happened.
to overcome.
I try to look into the future and eventually will do the same.
Honey I am so sorry for your loss. Here is a link to a message board for other mothers who are born sleeping angel. Good luck to you. They all understand what you discard.
http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-pps ...
I have not lost a child before birth, but I have lost a child several years ago. Everyone is correct, I would like to add something.
When my son, he was eleven years old. It was my second son, and had an older sister and younger brother. I was happy then and still today, the children have always been my love, when her mother spilled was gone.
If you and your boyfriend) (well, I personally recommend the first man, but it really does not matter really try for another baby immediately, there is nothing ill try again. Yes, you are scared and worried that what went wrong the first time it is going wrong again. But do not listen to live and love and having children.
Moreover, the idea was that you can be your mind, or that other people might think you are "substitute" for the prodigal son. But after a couple of kids, you realize that even possible, even if the thought came to mind. They loveKey to energy, what wisdom and knowledge to learn patience and to give. Do not let this terrible situation and sad experiences in his own way.
If you have one, you become a parent to another. They have a deep understanding of how much their children are tragically not really theirs. Most of the "taken" to die. Even if they survive to birth, infancy, childhood, youth and parents to grow (lol), and still do things against the approval and bear the consequences grow, and beyond. I go and go. It will not make that easier to let go, but the parents in this respect offers a much better result than trying to keep her mother in a box.
You will lose a lot of memories of your baby - sorry to say but true. This is partly because there is little time together to make memories - the pain is terrible in all memories not in a position to do together. You do not need to "forget" him - every year9, ll remember your birthday in your heart. Following the submission of their high school anonymously and dream of the man who might have been. You see a beautiful girl of her age and I wonder whether I could be his girlfriend or wife. Go to sporting events with their other children to come and I wonder what could be the sport and if there is something good in them. If I climbed the trees have broken or a dog, arm or a leg? Would it have been a bookworm or quit? Would it have been wise, or that its strength lies in the muscles? Would it be hard or soft?
The pain does not disappear, but is a little easier. Anniversaries are hard, and even if you do not agree on the surface of your mind, remember, your body. I have a terrible August of each year, because my son was killed, the 10th August. Last year was the first year, I do not remember - but I slept a lot and I feel terrible if I remember the day. But there is joy in the middle, life flowsforward.
I will pay no pressure, but I tell you, a cup of maternal love, and will not hurt, or someone, anyone.
Hello,
The sorry to hear about your loss,
My baby died in my stomach, I have in my analysis, as seen when she told me, is dead, I felt my heart was torn down. I argued and screamed her sister told her that I knew he was not dead because I saw the accused of lying to be honest I do not remember, I remember to leave room or something of the disorder in the Lost Boy, and was pregnant again 4 months later mygorgeous son is now 5, told me that I am not the hospital girl after my son, I s I never had an explanation why, but there is still much to my surprise, 3 years of a beautiful little girl. I always thought that after the model was obviously wrong and that it does not improve life for him, I know it's hard, but that's what I think, because I do what you're doing 'm sure I made the right choice . When I was pregnant with my son, I was during the first 2 or 3 months and found that I am relaxed because I was stress and unease about the more I became aware, concerned that I was causing stress in my little baby develops. Time is a great healer, and because each of theay to spend my off the excitement. Everyone is different and we all have our own strengths and weaknesses of each of us in the eye path. One thing I have noticed that haunts me a little, and pregnant with my son, I had dreams of something terrible happening to him and also someone who took the time to complete than I, "I had my daughter that I very badly Even now 3rd I woke up repeatedly called his name. Im not sure if this is something to do with the loss of my first son, but he explains. Once I saw the half and told me that a child was watching over me and I like to think that makes me feel good. I can assure you, you get over the loss of his son and the memories are still there, but you know even the memories fade, but sometimes for the better. I promise to return to smile.
Much Love
I think the term "death" is wrong and insensitive. The child died, "was" not yet. It sounds so clinical.
In any case, it is sad that it happened, but all too true these days. It is necessary to stand up and accept what happened, and we are proud to be known and has been so long with Mateo Mateo, as he did it, and recognize it as part of his life plan.
You're a good man, I can say.
Good luck and Happy Valentine's Day (which no longer remember it?)
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